The Perfect Storm

Solomon says in the Bible that there is nothing new under the sun (Ecc 1:9). The enemy has no new tricks, he is not all-knowing, he is simply crafty and he waits for moments, seasons and opportunities of vulnerability. Recently, I was vulnerable to just such an attack. I don’t want to be just a writer of when the times are good, but I also want to be real and relevant.

I wrote the last blog, drawing a very definite line in the sand about us having a house before the end of the year. Our journey of faith, the culmination of this season of adventure for us. On the heels of that high came a definite low. I am not an overly emotional girl, I don’t often sit down and just cry or feel such overwhelming sorrow that my energy is all but sapped. I am more of a ‘take the bull by the horns’ kind of girl. If the Bible says it then I will face it with my head held high and a smile on my face, even if I’m shaking in my boots. That’s who I am.

So, I wrote the blog, then was given an opportunity/nudge to pray over some men that I walked away from. I then annihilated my comfort walls and went back, in obedience and prayed over them, so now I’m feeling good about myself. I stepped out with the blog and with live humans. The next day was Monday and it donned with heavy skies and a forecast of 2 weeks of rain, which meant no work for 2 weeks. Then our truck started acting funny, so to the shop it went. Our dog went to the Vet for a regular check-up, leaves with a diagnosis of heart worms and it will cost: more than is currently in the bank. Our heater wasn’t working, and it was cold and wet. Then my son asks me if we will always have a job that’s so easily affected by the weather. My folks were sending lots of pictures of the new cabin they are building, they were excited not bragging, but due to all my woes it hit me like a ton of bricks that day. All these things built up and I ended up in bed, weeping, feeling utterly defeated. Laying there with no energy to get up, and no real energy to pray, I just kept thanking the Lord for bottling and counting all my tears and for loving me and for having a plan out of this despair.

This pit was hard to climb out of. I was sensitive and overwhelmed. It took a few days to be able to fully process it all and to see God in it. He has been so gracious to me. To remind me that He wants to be my All in all.  Turns out our truck transmission had a 50k mile warranty and we were at 47k miles, so it was fully covered and restored. Work resumed. We figured out how to get our puppy taken care of. God is faithful especially when we are weak. And He was not at all surprised that the current was bringing in the perfect storm to bring me to my knees and cry out, Father I need You!